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Across Five Aprils




Альбом Across Five Aprils


A Tragedy In Progress (20.05.2003)
20.05.2003
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So sure of what i wanted.
But what wanted me?
Money speaks louder than my dreams.
Normal life was something I'd seen as tragedy.
The future is never what it seems.
Common life has come so easily.
Money adds so much to normalcy.
Better years turned bitter.
Why can't I do what's right for me?
Turning the page means burning the versus
of the ones I wrote this with.
Certainty has come at such a high price
but it's the price I pay for peace of mind
but do I mind the peace that comes along and all things aside,
understand these are my dreams
we lived them together for a moment in time.
Is this the beginning of the end?
Or the end of the beginning?
Watch it fade away.
Watching this thing change.
Common life has come so easily.
Money adds so much to normalcy.
Better years turned bitter.
Why can't I do what's right for me?


. . .



[Spoken:]
Do you love me?
I mean really love me.
'Cause if you don't then I'll just have to kill you...

Trading 19 years for 19 minutes (following the trends).
Clinging with empty fists your falling in it (this cycle never ends).
Wanting to not want this yet living out tomorrows regret.
Regretting to not forget the stuff that comes with it
but you're feeling so special I bet.
But you're feeling so special I bet, I bet.

Why are you so proud that you took
away this gift from the one she'll truly care for?

How do you testify on giving up the one thing you had to lose.
How would you rest if I, how would you rest if I
said I want to trade it all and be there for you.
How would you rest if I testified on you.

Don't give up, don't give in, hold on.
Don't give up, don't give in, be strong.
Don't give up, don't give in, hold on.
Don't give up, don't give in, be strong.

One last chance [x5]


. . .



When you said goodnight, didn't you mean
Goodbye! Goodbye!
It's not the way you loved me, but definitely
How you hurt me! How you hurt me!
Your lies like a dagger through my heart.
Pierced me where it, where it hurts the most.
If you were gone, would I miss you, or would I be grateful?
I still love you, I still love you.
All I ever wanted was your love.


. . .



We broke down the walls one brick at a time.
But infatuation cuts quick and you sharpen the knife.
A smile can only get you so far, blue eyed suicide.
I was willing to throw it all away but you couldn't decide.
A smile can only get you so far, blue eyed suicide.
These walls will be higher next time you try to break them and break in.
Your existence it burns my eyes.
Everytime I try and close them.
I thought that things were different this time around.
I thought I found someone who meant what they said.
Beyond four letters, beyond four letters.
I guess I thought that things were different.
This time around.


. . .



Without cause people disapear right before my eyes.
Did they speak the truth or were their words disposable.
My heart is bleeding you've caused me so much pain.
Go ahead leave you're not worth it.
Heartache is all that I know.
Heartache I embrace now,
it's all I have left in the years I've invested.
Thoughtless human shut your mouth.
You broke my heart.
You've turned your back on all we've been through.
The times we've shared I don't miss you.
But I miss who you used to be.


. . .



I don't look that familiar.
No, I don't know you from anywhere.
Would you care to just be straight with me?
You just met me for the first time and that's fine.
Why are you so afraid to speak your mind?
Instead you speak the mind of everyone else.
Just think what you could have said.
If you had only thought for yourself.
To bad you were force-fed feelings.
And now you've blocked your own mind out of your head.
If you ever want to think on your own, it's ok.
Go ahead.
Open hands that know not what to hold on to.
Closed minds that hold off on what they know is true.


. . .



Dear Sam,
I'm sorry I pushed you away from everything we had, even me.
I couldn't ask you to wait forever.
But that doesn't mean that my feelings have changed,
every day your face is clearer.
Regret is the burden I'll carry from here to my grave.
This distance is the knife in my heart.
Let him know the treasure he has.
Don't let him make my mistakes.
Forever is never to long to wait for something perfect,
I'll be here.
Love always.


. . .



Roll down the windows, the AC's busted.
12 hours from home and empty pockets.
Didn't get our garuntee another show for free.
All for the sake of this rock n roll.
It's time to switch drivers.
My shift's over I've been driving for 8 hours.
It's all worth it, when I plug in and the lights dim.
The best 30 minutes of my life...every night.
We'll always be here when the rubber hits the road.
Dedication never ending.
1 2 3 Go.
Broken sticks and broken strings, every night.
But that's the way it goes, it's alright.
A life composed of sticks and strings.
It's my release, my dedication comes from within.
It's evident that this is my passion.
This is the end to everything that's ending.
This is the death to everything that dies.
The fire behind us burns inside my heart.
The fists might fly, but this stage is mine.


. . .



Am I wasting my time with these feelings?
The pressure's off now so I'm back on the ground.
Too bad, I kind of liked it in the clouds with you.
Because you take me away from everything and everyone,
that's held me back for so long.
Heaven for a few days, makes up for all the hell that life's dealt me,
even now that's gone.
It seems he's got your attention now, lucky guy.
But isn't that the way it always ends?
It seems he's got your attention just like you got mine.
I'll express my feelings, then sit back and watch you walk away.
You're beautiful in every way to me.


. . .



I'm lifted by your words.
They mean so much.
It's been so long since I've smiled.
You bring me new life.
Is this a dream?
If so I don't want to ever wake.
Let me sleep forever.
Embrace this moment, it's too good to last for long.
Although I wish it could.
Don't leave me now, it's too hard, to stand without you.


. . .



Complete and total adoration,
My gift to you, my heart was yours,
In ten weeks you shaped it,
In one night you murdered it.
Torn from my chest and laid at your feet,
That first step you took was the worst.
Since then you've walked a thousand miles in solace and short remark,
And I still have these memories,
But we'll never see what we could have been.
Remember when we talked about where we'd be a year from now?
Remember when you held my hand like you'd never let it go?
Remember, cause that's all you can do.
We'll never make another memory,
We'll never make another memory.
I wish I'd have died in your arms the last time we were together,
So I wouldn't have to wake without you today.
This time I thought things were real,
You said they were,
What happened?
You were a priority,
Was I an option?
I let you see a side of me that I don't share with anyone.
Promises are just words unless they are fulfilled.
Knew from the beginning all I had to offer you was my heart,
I'm sorry that it wasn't enough.
So, we'll go our own ways,
And hopefully you'll remember the things I've told you,
Hopefully you'll understand that everything I said was in sincerity.
A broken heart is not what I wanted from this,
But I guess I've learned from it.
But aren't you supposed to learn from your mistakes?
I don't consider this a mistake,
I just wish the story didn't end this way,
Cause I'm still in love with the person who helped me write it.
Remember when you held my hand like you'd never let it go?
Remember when we talked about where we'd be a year from now?


. . .



Heart-shaped hallways.
Leading the way to nowhere.
You left me stranded here.
Three years from anywhere.
No sign of a way back only fear.
I'll just follow the fragrance of these fake tears.
Your silence says it all. I know your throat is swelling.
You want to say so much.
But you're afraid you might say what you mean.
I loved you for who you were.
You tried and tried to change me.
It's funny now how you say you're leaving.
Because I'm not the man I used to be.
Shape someone else now, mold someone new.
Take someone else down, your heart-shaped hallway too.
TAKE! someone else now, TAKE! someone new.
TAKE! some one else down, your heart-shaped hallway too.


. . .


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